As a parent we raise our children the best of our knowledge and who is to say it was right or wrong when there is no instruction advising us on anything so we do what we think is right and learn along with the children, a sister or brother may not agree with the way you are rearing your children however that do not make theirs perfect either because they are depending up on the same things that you did. A community just like a family is made up of different people different personalities so is a family.
Just because you disagrees with your family or your neighbor do not mean that you should shut your doors of life cut them off from all aspect of your life. Let me straighten this out a little an abandonment of the heart is doing as that person that may have hurt you or done wrong by you, although we have a way of pleasing out minds by saying to ourselves if they hadn't done this I may not have did what I did or I would not act the way I do towards them, oh we do have our ways.
Unfortunately that puts you in the same place that the other person is in you have become them oh and yes they think the same way about you unforgiving or abandonment of heart always end with being unhappiness or along nobody enjoys being along I will not listen to that because you see we were all put here for each other. By no means do I want any one to allow some one to abuse them physically or mentally. that is not what I am saying at all I am saying that there is a better way to do it with out becoming that other person and with out the hurtful pains that goes along with loosing someone you love.
Our lives are complicated and family just can not deal with a lot of things that goes on with in it. Some family members do not have the understanding of being a family to be able to deal with it. Other just do not want to deal with situation that are unpleasant or embarrassing to them although it have nothing to do with them personally. Family are not that piece of jewel that one can visit every Family meeting or get together and admire it is something we must work at and one of the things we can do is to respect others and don't expect them to be like we are. We also need to remember that family is to be enjoyed loved not agreed with every time something is said or done.
Cousin, sisters brothers parents, we all are different people and need to see each others as such, not as that is my and he or she treated me this way or that my mom had a saying for this she said "forgive them and feed them with a long handle spoon". As a child I did not understand what it was that she meant so when I was old enough I asked her and this is what she said "forgive threat them nice but never give them the chance to hurt you again." Notice Forgive them, how many of us in a family do this or how many of us don't like something and go along to get along no matter how some one have hurt us. Be better Forgive them (after letting them know that they hurt you) but never allow them close enough to hurt you in that way again. Speak and always be pleasant and happy. Love you all!